They called me PeaCH

I am writing the young me a letter.

Coming back to here, reminds me of how I used to be and all the struggles. Honestly,  honey I have so much to tell you.

I remember, going back home this year and a found a letter you wrote to me. How innocent and cute you are.

I could barely remember the feeling of excitement to kiss someone, to cuddle, to make out. The me now even when I had sex, I fear a little. But that's about it. Because I know what I want and I will be fine. I guess when you gain, you do lose. I have gained experience, wisdom, knowledge and yet I lose fear, and sometimes fear brings excitement. Honestly, I don't know what am I saying at this point. It doesn't feel like it's quite like that case either.

But, I want to write you a letter still.

Your fears, your hardships, your goals. It will change,

You think you could, in fact you always could. But you never thought were u meant to be tho? I am not saying this in a bad way. Like everyone has their own path and way. Maybe you are just different. You don't meant to take the usual way. Even if you so could, but you wouldn't, in the end. So don't beat yourself up for that.

Maybe you are not meant for taking the easy way out. You are not meant to ace first. You are meant to ace big. Maybe you are not meant to change the world. You are meant to create a whole new world. You are not meant for studying your heart out and no procrastination at all. I know maybe now you could barely feel it or see it that way, even now I sometimes still struggle too, slow is not slow, stopping is slow. Make sure you keep going. Because no matter how awesome you are now, it wont last. Time flies. The life you have keeps going. Because you are shit now, hold on. Life goes on.

Example, I don't know how many years behind I'm writing back to myself. But let me tell you a secret. You used to think you are ugly and love I am not even gonna deny maybe you are. But now, you may not be the prettiest girl on earth. But, everyone who have met you, have fallen in love with you, inside out, outside in. For sure, you are the cutest girl on this entire whatever that exist and non-existent. Don't take that for granted. Shine.

You will suffer and you will learn to see joy in it. You will hate yourself and you will learn to love yourself and you will forgive yourself. You think you are loving yourself but in fact, you are self sabotaging. You learned and you will learn. You will always keep going even you think you are done, or it seems like its over for you. YOU ALWAYS COME OUT STRONGER.

Your mum, she loves you a lot. Even at times she seems heartless and like always couldn't see your effort. Because she fears. She fears that you will stop, like your father. And she is not expressive. Her words sometimes doesn't match the intention or the feelings of hers. She is the action type. She loves you more than anyone one else in the world. One day, you will understand and she will too, and you both will make peace. Because she is open-minded and always moving forward too like you, she is one of the reason why u never die, you always keep moving on and forward. You has her sprit and guts, and she always will guide you.

But love, you can't depend on her. At one point you have to find yourself, even if you felt like you never been so lost. My advice to you, just because it seems like there's no future in that career. Try. Don't always play safe. You are not your mum. Just cuz you can bear with it doesn't mean u like it. But also doesn't mean you don't. Just live, let the fear shows who you are, not stopping you from being yourself.

Live girl. You are born confident own it. Even if you don't meet any criteria of what this world have set, who cares if you are dumb in their definition, fat and ugly in their definition. You are not meant to be part of their world. You are meant to create and rule your own world. Fucking hell. Own that confident, go create a disaster.


You always ask how can mum be this strong, honey. She spent 8-9 months to create this heart of yours. Your story starts from her and she already started hers off so strong, What chu say yours will be hon?

Fucking hell, you don't have to be strong enough, you just need to realize you are always more than enough.

With love,
Future Lucene.

Real name Lucene W. ReeNee
Nick Name Peach or TaoZi or Pretty (your choice) :P
Grade sophomore year`14
Birthday Well I was born on Feb(lovely Pisces<3) 98
Languages Basically I speak more than 3 languages
Born of place not earth :P
Hobbies reading... oh and writing :D
Fav.colour blue
Fav.animal Lucky?/my dog<- HELL long time ago-3-

Facts about ME
1.I don't give a shit
2.I speak fluent sarcasm because telling someone(aka humans/idiots) you are stupid is consider very rude. (tho I don't see why being honest is rude and telling lies are manners)
3.I like British ,reason : 1) Their accent. 2) Their accent and 3) Their accent.
4. I don't put any make up on. Cause I like to be ugly (just kidding.) I just feel like being myself.
5. I'm still thinking should I publish my story on Wattpad or nah and I have wrote like 10000+++ stories and yet haven't publish one.
6. I really like to write but I guess you already know that.
7. A pro fantasizer.
8. I don't like to lose. (which always cost me a lot of trouble *sighing* but I like it.)
9. When people say that I can't I will always do it to prove to them. (like I said I don't like to lose.)
10. I want to be fearless and I will be.
11. I like gorgeous blue eyes when I say gorgeous I mean very light blue and a little violet (I really like blue or blue-purple color. <3)
12. I like brown hair and dirty blonde.P.S. it's dirty blonde not just blonde LOL I'm insane and weird <3
13. I know guys don't really like strong girl but I just can't stand those fake innocent slut and I will never ever be one of them.


Ask ME_
If you have any question or you wanna know more You can always leave a comment (which I might not realize:P) So you can ask me on askfm @Peach TaoZi (exp, my kik or snapchat ... but maybe I won't give it to u :P)

More information_
Profile
Find me on :
Facebook | Twitter | Instagram

This theme is made byThis pretty

I am writing the young me a letter.

Coming back to here, reminds me of how I used to be and all the struggles. Honestly,  honey I have so much to tell you.

I remember, going back home this year and a found a letter you wrote to me. How innocent and cute you are.

I could barely remember the feeling of excitement to kiss someone, to cuddle, to make out. The me now even when I had sex, I fear a little. But that's about it. Because I know what I want and I will be fine. I guess when you gain, you do lose. I have gained experience, wisdom, knowledge and yet I lose fear, and sometimes fear brings excitement. Honestly, I don't know what am I saying at this point. It doesn't feel like it's quite like that case either.

But, I want to write you a letter still.

Your fears, your hardships, your goals. It will change,

You think you could, in fact you always could. But you never thought were u meant to be tho? I am not saying this in a bad way. Like everyone has their own path and way. Maybe you are just different. You don't meant to take the usual way. Even if you so could, but you wouldn't, in the end. So don't beat yourself up for that.

Maybe you are not meant for taking the easy way out. You are not meant to ace first. You are meant to ace big. Maybe you are not meant to change the world. You are meant to create a whole new world. You are not meant for studying your heart out and no procrastination at all. I know maybe now you could barely feel it or see it that way, even now I sometimes still struggle too, slow is not slow, stopping is slow. Make sure you keep going. Because no matter how awesome you are now, it wont last. Time flies. The life you have keeps going. Because you are shit now, hold on. Life goes on.

Example, I don't know how many years behind I'm writing back to myself. But let me tell you a secret. You used to think you are ugly and love I am not even gonna deny maybe you are. But now, you may not be the prettiest girl on earth. But, everyone who have met you, have fallen in love with you, inside out, outside in. For sure, you are the cutest girl on this entire whatever that exist and non-existent. Don't take that for granted. Shine.

You will suffer and you will learn to see joy in it. You will hate yourself and you will learn to love yourself and you will forgive yourself. You think you are loving yourself but in fact, you are self sabotaging. You learned and you will learn. You will always keep going even you think you are done, or it seems like its over for you. YOU ALWAYS COME OUT STRONGER.

Your mum, she loves you a lot. Even at times she seems heartless and like always couldn't see your effort. Because she fears. She fears that you will stop, like your father. And she is not expressive. Her words sometimes doesn't match the intention or the feelings of hers. She is the action type. She loves you more than anyone one else in the world. One day, you will understand and she will too, and you both will make peace. Because she is open-minded and always moving forward too like you, she is one of the reason why u never die, you always keep moving on and forward. You has her sprit and guts, and she always will guide you.

But love, you can't depend on her. At one point you have to find yourself, even if you felt like you never been so lost. My advice to you, just because it seems like there's no future in that career. Try. Don't always play safe. You are not your mum. Just cuz you can bear with it doesn't mean u like it. But also doesn't mean you don't. Just live, let the fear shows who you are, not stopping you from being yourself.

Live girl. You are born confident own it. Even if you don't meet any criteria of what this world have set, who cares if you are dumb in their definition, fat and ugly in their definition. You are not meant to be part of their world. You are meant to create and rule your own world. Fucking hell. Own that confident, go create a disaster.


You always ask how can mum be this strong, honey. She spent 8-9 months to create this heart of yours. Your story starts from her and she already started hers off so strong, What chu say yours will be hon?

Fucking hell, you don't have to be strong enough, you just need to realize you are always more than enough.

With love,
Future Lucene.