They called me PeaCH

Sometimes, I think I have taken my own smile for granted. I smile too much until I forgot how to cry. I'm sad hurting inside but instead I smile. It's not that I don't wanna cry it's just that I forgot how to cry. I am hurt inside but I feel numb outside I have reached this stage where I think there's no point crying. I think it's funny when people ask me "Why are you always smiling? Why are you smiling are you feeling very happy? How can you always be smiling?"  pffff nah I'm just used to it. I thought to myself. Sometimes, if you ask me do I miss that feeling when you feel like bursting out tears and you're trying your best to hold your tears back? Yes to be honest I miss that feeling. It burn my soul like hell. My heart aches until I couldn't breathe. It hurts so freaking bad. I feel like dying and yet the pains burns like alive. Then I have come to point where idgaf anymore I'm not afraid of crying. As time fly by I feel like crying won't even cure the pain or solve the problem so why even bother to cry?  I lost all of my senses. I asked myself since when I became this silence? Sometimes, I couldn't deny I love to torture myself. I feel the pain I feel my feelings. My very own feelings.

Maybe where there is pain there is joy. Sometimes I don't even know myself. I am lost and yet I'm not. I'm free and yet freedom is not by my side. Sometimes, words means nothing to me they won't affect me, the next day I care so much until my heart sore. I told myself everyone is here to bring you down so why bother? They don't have a life. Even though they have one they don't know how to live it. So why care their words?  That's basically my motto in life. People don't even know and yet they are the first one to judge me. I feel idk sad? mad? I seriously have no idea what am I feeling as far as I'm concern I let their words bring me down. I felt for their words. I feel like you don't even know me. You don't even know how I live my life how I fight back those hidden or obvious battles you don't know what I have been through, You didn't know because I kept silence and I smile even my heart is bleeding. I may not been through those battles that you have been through I may not live the life that you have I may not suffer the way you did. But isn't it likewise? Have you been through what I have been through? The only difference between me and you is that I don't show even though you look deep inside you won't even see a single scratch and you wear everything out on your sleeve. Or maybe all those are the acts that you put on your sleeve to cover the scar or wound. Who knows? I'm not going to judge.

I feel so much and yet I'm numb. I know I am becoming the one I wanna be. I know this struggle is the best because I feel so much. In the end I suffer for nothing. Sometimes, people ask why would you still do that? Aren't you tortured enough? Seriously I have no idea why. The only reason that I can came up is that all I do is to feel. To feel is the best curse you can ever have. Because to feel is a curse that dress up like a gift and sometimes it even feels like gift. Maybe sometimes things happen because they can you don't really need a reason for everything. I am still struggling and I will struggle forever. I will find joy in it. Pain and joy come in the same direction. Feelings, right? A curse or a gift? Is it because I see the world too clear or because this is just the beginning? Well why care when you can just not. *shrugs*

A smile can really change a lot of things.

If you read this till the end. I think you wasted your time wisely. By the way there's no one here just me. I haven't express myself for so long and it feels so good to write(or type). I will always love writing, always. No one is here that's why I feel so safe to express here (or I just simply don't give a f.) Oppsssssss. I swear I didn't mean fuck, I'm not going to curse. I swear *hold three fingers up*

Byebye see ya till idk when but yeah ....whatever, *waves my hand*

Real name Lucene W. ReeNee
Nick Name Peach or TaoZi or Pretty (your choice) :P
Grade sophomore year`14
Birthday Well I was born on Feb(lovely Pisces<3) 98
Languages Basically I speak more than 3 languages
Born of place not earth :P
Hobbies reading... oh and writing :D
Fav.colour blue
Fav.animal Lucky?/my dog<- HELL long time ago-3-

Facts about ME
1.I don't give a shit
2.I speak fluent sarcasm because telling someone(aka humans/idiots) you are stupid is consider very rude. (tho I don't see why being honest is rude and telling lies are manners)
3.I like British ,reason : 1) Their accent. 2) Their accent and 3) Their accent.
4. I don't put any make up on. Cause I like to be ugly (just kidding.) I just feel like being myself.
5. I'm still thinking should I publish my story on Wattpad or nah and I have wrote like 10000+++ stories and yet haven't publish one.
6. I really like to write but I guess you already know that.
7. A pro fantasizer.
8. I don't like to lose. (which always cost me a lot of trouble *sighing* but I like it.)
9. When people say that I can't I will always do it to prove to them. (like I said I don't like to lose.)
10. I want to be fearless and I will be.
11. I like gorgeous blue eyes when I say gorgeous I mean very light blue and a little violet (I really like blue or blue-purple color. <3)
12. I like brown hair and dirty blonde.P.S. it's dirty blonde not just blonde LOL I'm insane and weird <3
13. I know guys don't really like strong girl but I just can't stand those fake innocent slut and I will never ever be one of them.


Ask ME_
If you have any question or you wanna know more You can always leave a comment (which I might not realize:P) So you can ask me on askfm @Peach TaoZi (exp, my kik or snapchat ... but maybe I won't give it to u :P)

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Sometimes, I think I have taken my own smile for granted. I smile too much until I forgot how to cry. I'm sad hurting inside but instead I smile. It's not that I don't wanna cry it's just that I forgot how to cry. I am hurt inside but I feel numb outside I have reached this stage where I think there's no point crying. I think it's funny when people ask me "Why are you always smiling? Why are you smiling are you feeling very happy? How can you always be smiling?"  pffff nah I'm just used to it. I thought to myself. Sometimes, if you ask me do I miss that feeling when you feel like bursting out tears and you're trying your best to hold your tears back? Yes to be honest I miss that feeling. It burn my soul like hell. My heart aches until I couldn't breathe. It hurts so freaking bad. I feel like dying and yet the pains burns like alive. Then I have come to point where idgaf anymore I'm not afraid of crying. As time fly by I feel like crying won't even cure the pain or solve the problem so why even bother to cry?  I lost all of my senses. I asked myself since when I became this silence? Sometimes, I couldn't deny I love to torture myself. I feel the pain I feel my feelings. My very own feelings.

Maybe where there is pain there is joy. Sometimes I don't even know myself. I am lost and yet I'm not. I'm free and yet freedom is not by my side. Sometimes, words means nothing to me they won't affect me, the next day I care so much until my heart sore. I told myself everyone is here to bring you down so why bother? They don't have a life. Even though they have one they don't know how to live it. So why care their words?  That's basically my motto in life. People don't even know and yet they are the first one to judge me. I feel idk sad? mad? I seriously have no idea what am I feeling as far as I'm concern I let their words bring me down. I felt for their words. I feel like you don't even know me. You don't even know how I live my life how I fight back those hidden or obvious battles you don't know what I have been through, You didn't know because I kept silence and I smile even my heart is bleeding. I may not been through those battles that you have been through I may not live the life that you have I may not suffer the way you did. But isn't it likewise? Have you been through what I have been through? The only difference between me and you is that I don't show even though you look deep inside you won't even see a single scratch and you wear everything out on your sleeve. Or maybe all those are the acts that you put on your sleeve to cover the scar or wound. Who knows? I'm not going to judge.

I feel so much and yet I'm numb. I know I am becoming the one I wanna be. I know this struggle is the best because I feel so much. In the end I suffer for nothing. Sometimes, people ask why would you still do that? Aren't you tortured enough? Seriously I have no idea why. The only reason that I can came up is that all I do is to feel. To feel is the best curse you can ever have. Because to feel is a curse that dress up like a gift and sometimes it even feels like gift. Maybe sometimes things happen because they can you don't really need a reason for everything. I am still struggling and I will struggle forever. I will find joy in it. Pain and joy come in the same direction. Feelings, right? A curse or a gift? Is it because I see the world too clear or because this is just the beginning? Well why care when you can just not. *shrugs*

A smile can really change a lot of things.

If you read this till the end. I think you wasted your time wisely. By the way there's no one here just me. I haven't express myself for so long and it feels so good to write(or type). I will always love writing, always. No one is here that's why I feel so safe to express here (or I just simply don't give a f.) Oppsssssss. I swear I didn't mean fuck, I'm not going to curse. I swear *hold three fingers up*

Byebye see ya till idk when but yeah ....whatever, *waves my hand*